Is it wrong to use sex to pressure or defraud your spouse?
Yes, it is wrong. The marriage relationship must not be used to defraud or bring pressure on a spouse for something of one’s own volition. Paul says defraud not one another unless by consent, and any abstaining should be brief, with couples coming together again lest Satan tempt through incontinency.
Les explains that the marriage relationship is not to be used to defraud or to bring pressure to bear on a spouse for something that is of one’s own volition. Paul says, “Defraud not one another, unless it be by consent.” There can be emotional stress or physical impairment, but all things being normal, if a couple consents to abstain from the marriage relationship for a time, that is allowed. However, Les teaches that it should not be prolonged; they are to come together again so Satan does not tempt them for their incontinency. The sex drive is powerful, and God put it there for a purpose, but it is not to be abused any more than anything else.
Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.