Why could Paul never get over the persecution he had committed against the church?
Paul could never get over his persecution of the church because, after he learned that the One he was persecuting was actually his Old Testament Jehovah, the realization beat him down. He sorrowed that he had voted for death, punished believers often, and compelled them to blaspheme.
Les teaches that after Saul of Tarsus received authority from the chief priests, he gave his voice or vote against believers when they were put to death, choosing death over prison: “Why feed an enemy? Get rid of him. Take no prisoners.” He punished them often in every synagogue and compelled them to blaspheme, forcing them to blaspheme Jesus Christ, recant their faith in Him, or be put to death. Les explains that once Saul found out the One he was persecuting was really his Old Testament Jehovah, it beat him down, and he never could quite get over it. He sorrowed for the day he had so persecuted these Jewish believers, and later said he was the least of the apostles because he persecuted the church, the assembly of God, those Jewish believers at Jerusalem.